Your Grace and Mercy! { Day +121 }

Your grace and mercy, brought me through

I'm living this moment because of You

I want to thank You, and praise You too

Your grace and mercy, brought me through

It's been 11 days since my anti-rejection pills were brought down from 125 mg. to 100 mg. And I am fine! I mean I did not feel any different which is good. If I did not mention before, Cyclosporine, my anti-rejection pills, is an immunosuppressants drugs.

FACTS: Immunosuppressive drugs or immunosuppressants are drugs that are used in immunosuppressive therapy to inhibit or prevent activity of the immune system. (Wikipedia)

Since it inhibit or prevent the activity of my immunce system, I am more likely to get bacterial, fungal or viral infections. So I was a little bit concerned when the doctors decreased my dosage for the first time. Will my body recognize the bone marrow and not reject it? Or will my immune system protects me from infections? These were questions I had at the back of my mind. What I forgot was that God has His best plans for me...

Thank You, for saving a sinner like me

To tell the world salvation is free

There were times when I just didnt do right

But You watched over me, all day and night

Tomorrow will also be my 4 months anniversary when my bone marrow was transplanted. From day 0 or transplant day, I still have the risk of not making it, but I know He is watching over me, all day and night...I'm living this moment because of HIM.

The devotional book I am reading, dated January 28 by Morris Venden on "Fitforever", he said "May you find the peace that God offers, regardless of whatever may come your way today." This is my prayer for me and you...

What a Day... { Day +111 }

This week, Filipino churches at Greater Toronto Area are celebrating week of Revival. At Mt. Zion Church, my kumadre (Mareng Anna Salamanca), Jeimer Gorospe sang with Kuya Jerry Tulod as the guitarist for the Message in Song. They sang "What a Day That Will Be", hearing the song made me cry.

I first heard the song from Kuya Danny Miranda, Kuya Ernie Maminta and Kuya Nonoy Norte with his Harmonica. They came visit me at the hospital and sang me songs of praises to cheer me up. This was the last one they sang and I even asked them to sang it again and again. The message comforted me so much. Although, with tears, this song inspired me when I was lying in hospital bed about 9 months ago.

Given 2-months to live by the doctor last March 29, or less than 50% chance that chemotherapy will work, or high risk of death on the first 7 days, fighting for my life, all these and more. What did I do?, I surrender myself to the One who knows the best, the One who promise a glorious day. My ordeal may not be finished yet but there is something I can look forward to...

What a day that will be when my Jesus I shall see,

And I look upon His face,

The One who saved me by His grace;

When He takes me by the hand

And leads me through the Promised Land,

What a day, glorious day that will be.

...Having faith, believing that God exists helps me go through this difficulty. I am sure believing helps me more than I can imagine :)

What A Day (MP3 file by Lisa Guillermo)

---January 17th Results---

Blood Pressure
Systolic - 135 (normal range = 90 to 135)
Diastolic - 100 (normal range = 50 to 90)

Complete Blood Count
HGB – 108 (normal range = 120 to 160)
PLT – 208
WBC - 4.1
Neut - 2.7 (normal range = 2.0 to 8.0)
Mg - 0.82
Creat - 64
CMV - negative

Liver Functions
ALB - Not Available
ALT - 26
ALP - 44
AST - 26
TBili - 6

Legend:
Green: Normal
Yellow: Abnormal
Red: Critical

Very True, Just Perfect! { Day +100 }

This morning, I did the Scripture Reading for the church program at Mt.Zion. And it is so good to be back as normal as possible. Well, you know what I mean, before I cannot even go to church now I can even participate to serve God.

Today, I passed another milestone, 100 days after transplant. That is because we have a Compassionate High Priest...

Our Compassionate High Priest

14 Seeing then that we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. 15 For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Hebrews 4:14-16 (New King James Version)

This is the Scripture I read this morning. Just perfect for my 100-days and for sure any day I will complete...Next milestone will be sixth month.

So far, so good...{ Day +97 }

It's been 7 days after my restricted diet. I've been waiting for this because I can have or try again those foods that I have to avoid like mayonaise, ceasar salad dressing, aged cheeses and others. But if you're been away from those things, I found that it's not easy to go back again or just eat them again. Well, maybe I was scared to get sick from it. The only thing I tried after my 90 days strict diet was the ceasar salad dressing. It was okay, but for sure I will do this slowly.

Last Tuesday, I had my regular appointment at PMH. It was also good. I had questions but none of them were to be concerned of. Sample question I had, was the pain on the old bruises I had since last year. Yes, if I do press it I still feel pain. But the doctor said that is unusual. The discoloration may happen but not the pain. So he told me to pay attention if I will have new bruises.

This doctor also suggested that they might be able to lessen the Anti-rejection pill (Cyclosporine) I am taking soon. So hopefully when that happens I will still have no complications. I will let you know when I will start the less dosage and what is the effect on it to me.

---January 3rd Results---

Blood Pressure
Systolic - 125 (normal range = 90 to 135)
Diastolic - 80 (normal range = 50 to 90)

Complete Blood Count
HGB – 103 (normal range = 120 to 160)
PLT – 190
WBC - 5.1
Neut - 3.6 (normal range = 2.0 to 8.0)
Mg - 0.66 (normal range < 0.70)
Creat - 79
CMV - negative

Liver Functions
ALB - Not Available
ALT - 27
ALP - 44
AST - 29
TBili - 5

Legend:
Green: Normal
Yellow: Abnormal
Red: Critical

No More Crying, Mom { Day +94 }

One Saturday morning, my son, Jensine was crying before we left to go to church. I can't remember now, why. But anyway, everone tried to make him stop but noone was able to make him stop crying. It was those time when I couldn't stay close to him because he had colds or cough. But my mother-in-law said, maybe I should try. So then, I held him in my arms and right then and there, he just stopped, while I was singing to him...

You are my sunshine

My only sunshine

You make me happy

When skies are gray

You'll never know, dear

How much, I love you

Please don't take

My sunshine away.

The song just popped up from my head and seing my son's face seems like he understood the meaning of the song. Since then, this became our family's song. Just last week, he had colds again. My husband, Jerson really get upset when I stay closer to him. I do understand his concern, too. But sometimes, it's really hard to keep away from Jensine. It's surely harder for me and probably for my son, too. I end up crying, I guess, it's just one of those days :) Maybe, I've been missing him so much, although, we are together at home, but it's different when you cannot hold him near you. While I was trying to hide my tears from him, he still noticed and said to me "No more crying, mom". Oooh! That makes me cry harder because of mix feelings, happy, proud of my son and still a little bit of sadness. But it made me feel better inside.

REFLECTIONS: Are we forgetting that there is also a God who promised us to end tears. He's been trying to tell us "no more crying" if we just come to Him and accept Him. When my son told me that phrase, it also reminds me that our God just not tell you to stop crying but also tells us that He can end this tears.

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

Revelation 21:4